or: how I tried to go on a diet, and put myself in the hospital.
So I started Keto, an interesting concept diet. The basic idea is high fat, moderate protein, low carbohydrates. All my friends were doing it, and it seemed to be working for them.
I was VERY dedicated. I had a great mindset about it. Cravings NEVER came up for me. I was in exactly the right space to do this. I’d made hard decisions about foods I loved, and I was ready.
The first few days were great. I had energy, I was excited about the diet, trying new things, etc. I spent a bunch of time surfing thrift shops and such, picking up a bathroom scale, some various pieces of kitchen tools, etc. I purged out a bunch of my carby food, and bought lots of new foods that I’d need, things I knew I’d eat and like, and things I wanted to try.
And then somewhere towards day 4 or 5, I began losing my appetite.
Now I have a sleeping disorder. The sun, the clock, means VERY little to me. When it comes to eating food regularly, only my sense of hunger tells me when, what, and how much I should eat. So without any sense of hunger or desire for food.. I ate less. a lot less.
My caloric intake went from 1900 calories a day, to 1600 to 1200, to 1000, and less. And then I got sick. I slept a full night’s sleep, then woke up, fell asleep again, and slept ANOTHER 7 hours. After that, I tried making some breakfast, and I kept it down for a couple of hours, but soon enough I’d thrown it up. At some point, my intestines shut down and well.. I stopped going #2.
I went upstairs and collapsed in bed. Thus began a vicious cycle of trying to stay awake long enough to drink enough water to pee. For the next 2-3 days, I slept almost constantly. My condition deteriorated rapidly.
Cheesius came over and brought me some life giving potions and poultices.. or some Powerade and some broth and bullion. Unfortunately by this point I was so sick, even the thought of broth turned my stomach.
Some unknown amount of sleep later, Cheesius was yelling at me to go to the emergency room. I made one last effort to get something solid in me.I slowly ate a small amount of my housemate’s pizza, then went back to bed.
The next afternoon, after another 2-3 sleeps, I came downstairs. Desperate for a bowel movement, I decided to take a warm bath, in hopes of relaxing things. No such movement came, but pushing made me feel like I was going to throw up. trying to throw up only made me gag and get dizzy, and the bath had sucked away what strength I’d had.
I stumbled out of the bathroom in my robe, and shouted to my housemate.. “Emergency Room” then I tried to drink some water, got dizzy, felt like I’d end up blacking out, and went back to her and said “now please”.
And within 10 minutes, I was in the ER, naked and wet below the waist, in a bathrobe, with only my wallet and a pair of panties I’d thought to grab, in my pockets.
Over the next 17 hours or so, they pumped me full of saline and things. Trying to neutralize the crazy acidity of my blood, trying to lower my heart-rate stabilize my blood pressure, re-balance my electrolytes, etc etc. Apparently my kidneys had shut down at some point, either due to being overwhelmed by ketones, dehydration, or just stress.
They kept me overnight, they patched me back up, and sent me home. I walked in there near delirious probably pretty close to slipping into coma or something. The people in the ER said I definitely belonged there, and probably should have come in sooner.
The staff was amazing. The nurses were all very friendly, and treated me with both kindness and respect even though I was trans and a week from a shave, AND they knew I had no ability to pay. All dignity and privacy was out the door, yet there was nothing but the people treated me extremely well.
I was released around 3 pm and came home and went to bed. Chatted a bit with Cheesius on Skype then fell asleep.
I woke up at 11 pm, hungry.
I ordered some food from Domino’s, and I ate some of it. Chicken and cheesy bread.
More on where I stand on Keto, in the next post.
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